PSYCHO-SOCIAL THOUGHTS ON DEATH

Undoubtedly death and dying have been institutionalized in the United States. This has affected how we grieve and how we deal, or don’t deal, with death in general. Not so long ago the average person died in his/her home surrounded by family and friends. This was part of the grieving process and death was accepted as a part of life.
In my family death is an open subject and it is looked at as part of life. By looking at death in this manner, there is less fear. While it is hard to not fear the unknown, talking about the unknown and the fact that everyone, no matter who they are, will face this unknown makes the subject easier to deal with when it occurs.
Even my young children understand that death is part of life. I do not want them to become desensitized to death and take the human element out of a very human fact. At a very young age, most children begin asking questions about death. It is a common occurrence in everyday life; whether it is a death of a person, a death of an animal life, or even a death of a plant. To ignore a child’s questions about death, not only desensitizes him/her, it does not teach them how to cope with death.
Additionally, by institutionalizing death, we have increased the commercialization of the grieving process. While we are afraid to talk about death before or when it happens, we are not afraid to spend thousands upon thousands of dollars during the grieving process. That is how we deal with death; we throw money at it and those who cannot afford to spend thousands of dollars on a funeral are made to feel as if they have failed their loved one somehow. We are not afraid to make donations to help someone give a loved one a burial. We are not afraid to make our own arrangement, financial and otherwise, for our own death, but we are afraid to discuss death itself. I find that a bit strange.
My family takes the opinion that our funerals should be carried out in the cheapest legal means possible and that the majority of the grieving process needs to focus on connecting with those left behind, not on how our dead selves can be shown how much we were loved by the amount of money spent on our funeral.
Discussion questions:
1. How do you feel that death should be explained to children?
2. What is the best way to deal with the death of a loved one and the grieving process? And does spending a lot of money, really help people cope with death?

When men and women hit the point in their life called "mid life" they express themselves in different ways. We learned in class that men go out and buy the fancy sport cars and women have the plastic surgery done, this is if they can afford it. It's funny because a week after we learned about this in class my dad went out and bought a Harley that he has always wanted and I asked my mom why now? She told me that he has always wanted one and if she didn't let him do it now he would be too old and he had the money from recently selling his business. This makes sense that he purchased it after both of his children have moved away for college and he doesn't have to hull us around because we all know there isn't much room on a motorcycle except for him, which I think was his plan.

The Story of American Life

The American dream at one point in time was the ultimate fantasy for families migrating to the United States. However through out history, even if a person or persons has exceeded into the United States as a legal U.S. citizen they are not treated as such. The clip in class regarding the aliens in south africa touched on this issue. If someone is not born here, but knows that a better life is in America, or in the Aliens case earth, then why would they not want to try and move. When Immigrants try and begin their lives in the United States, they begin to try and fit into the norms of what our culture has developed. Since we see that they do not know how to act and behave to become an "excepted" U.S. citizen we begin to classify and use them. The clip demonstrated this through its website. The employeement opportunities for "aliens" were very poor quality jobs that humans new no body wanted. Since this is the only type of empolyeement humans offered to the aliens, they wanted to fit into society and expect these jobs to try and make it into our culture. Immigrants our no different from us, and if they travel to the United States in search of a better life and demonstrate that they can complete tasks and jobs in our society, what gives us the right to pick and choose their opportunities and income values. Just because most Americans are born with endless opportunities does not give us the right to stop others from different places to access these chances too.

Discussion Questions:

1. Is it right to deny a person of the same opportunties you have had as a U.S. citizen because they are not from America?

2. Can you describe a time in which you witnessed an immigrant being taken advantage of due to their status?

3. What can we do as U.S. citizens to fix this problem?

Alive in Joburgh, MNU

When first watching this YouTube video to be quite honest I was really confused on what was actually going on. Then looking at the MNU website, I was thinking who has this much time on their hands to make up this site. After discussing more about things in class it started to gel together.
This video can be used for educational purporses to show how it relates to how we treat immigrants and minorities everywhere. In the U.S. I feel that this could be very useful. We say we treat people equally, but just until this past year we have an African American President. We need to open our eyes more and not stop judging people by the way they look. This problem is not just in our country it is everywhere. If everyone could use a tool like this to show how we treat "aliens" maybe then it would be a start to stop what we do with the generations to come. This website and video could be used to show how people are treated, and how we as a society let it happen.

Discussion Question
1. If you watched this short clip on YouTube would now show it to others, or even your children?

2. If you answered yes to the question above, would you then explain to them what is actually going on in this clip, and how we as a nation judge others?

American Family vs. Economic Status

Today in the United States much emphasis is placed the value of hard work and what that hard work can get. Everyone, except the very young and the very old, is expected to have a job in order to be a contributing member of our capitalist and materialistic societ. Though our culture values family, women and men that decide to be stay-at-home parents or spouses are viewed as having less value than other working women and me.

Our society also expects Americans to show their contribution to capitalism other way. Displaying ownership or usage of the latest fashions in clothing, technology and entertainment give Americans status and popularity within our culture. Owning the latest video game console or attending the rock concert of the year is a mark of social and economic superiority.

This atmosphere of keeping up with the Jones’ exacerbates the very presence of materialism within our society. Americans have been socialized to desire the attention and status that they receive from their display of wealth. This desire in some cases will even override people’s logical sense of safety, financial security and health. Paying the electric bill or eating healthy foods takes a back seat to buying DVD’s and new clothes. This failing of logic demonstrates the imbalance between the American values of good health and happy family and the American ideal of wealth.

Discussion Questions:

What other American values are contradicted by the American ideal of attaining economic status?

In what other ways is American society influenced by materialism in our culture?

Breaking down closet doors

On November 4, 2008 Americans elected the first African American President in this country’s history; it was seen as a giant step forward in the fight for equality. On that same date Proposition 8 was passed by the citizens of California; they not only voted to take away the right of homosexuals in that state to be married, but they changed their state’s constitution in order to do so. To me, it is unbelievable that in today’s society people would vote to take another human’s rights away based on a stereotype and stigma that has been perpetuated by religious bigots for many years. As Harvey Milk so eloquently stated, “More people have been slaughtered in the name of religion than for any other single reason. That, my friends, that is true perversion.”

Harvey Milk was the first openly gay man to be elected to, and to serve in any type of government; he fought a long and exhaustive fight against the stereotypical view of homosexuals in order to prove that they deserved to be treated equally and without prejudice. In Milk’s time, he was fighting for the rights of homosexuals to be treated as humans and not as degenerates. He proposed that homosexuals that had not come out of the closet because they were afraid of repercussions from society were basically perpetuating the stigmatization of homosexuality.

It is understandable that “coming out” is a difficult task, many people who come out are setting themselves up for the possibility of rejection from the people who matter to them the most. I have to argue, however, that we need to break down these barriers once and for all in our society, and to do that we must stop running away from the painful issues that are involved. Milk said, "Burst down those closet doors once and for all, and stand up and start to fight." Homosexuals can not continue to allow the stereotypes that society has given to them to define them in a negative way. When someone’s doctor, neighbor, relative or friend comes out of the closet, it provides a new and healthier definition of what it is to be gay or lesbian, and once we start redefining the stereotypes in society we can begin the journey to equality.

Discussion Questions:

1. Has anyone that was close to you ever "come out of the closet", if yes did it change your perception of homosexuality? If no, do you think that it would change your perception?

2. Do you think that the stigmatization of homosexuals in this country can be ended? Why or why not?

3. Do you think that after some equality is attained by homosexuals that another group will acquire their negative status, in other words, do you think that Americans just need someone to hate?

Sexual Identity: Cultural Taboo's and Norms

Sexual identity is a social construct formed primarily through social and cultural factors. It is an extraordinarily complex concept which impacts and is affected by other identities within the individual. It begins to form in adolsecence due to hormonal changes and exploration of one's identity. Sexual identity encompasses many aspects of the individual including sexual orientation.
Society defines individuals as gay, straight, or bi-sexual in order to categorize and make proper judgements. It helps the collective to define what is 'right' and'wrong'. Sexual orientation is based on a continuum of 'heterosexual' and 'homosexual'. Heterosexual is the default orientation. It is considered by today's American culture to be the norm or 'right'. Homosexual is the taboo or stigimitzed label one can carry. There are various justifications society offers for the meanings implied by homosexuality. The most popular reasons are religious in nature or deal with procreation. Interestingly enough, findings show more similiarities than differences between homosexual and heterosexual couples.
Categorizing individuals in order to differeniate between what is 'right' and 'wrong' is vital to society and the protection of its members. However, this concept has been taken to extremes where everyone in every aspect must fit into a box i.e white, female, straight, middle class. Within recent decades we have begun to chip away slowly at these walls which stifle the gray area in which we live. Hopefully, one day this society will see true equality or at the very least equity.

Discussion Questions:
1. Norms and taboo's help us define what is 'right' and 'wrong'. Should society do away with these definitions to advance the equality of all? And, if we do how do we deal with pedophiles,
incest, and things of that nature?

2. Many people claim to be accepting of non-traditional lifestyles. How would you feel if someone in your immediate family came out? Would it be easier to accept if one had liberal tendancies?

3. We all have built in predjuices. Compare and contrast your feelings/thoughts towards the following
- 2 men kissing/being affectionate in public
-2 women kissing/being affectionate in public
-a man and woman kissing/being affectionate in public